I just love the MSN homepage. When I open my browser I am confronted by a fabulous array of fluffy stories about celebrity, sports figures, gruesome headline-worthy crimes and what we Americans like to call “lifestyle” features. I do not have a “lifestyle”, I have a life. I think there is a major difference. Maybe it is money, or the lack thereof? Not sure but I will continue to ponder it. Maybe its a lifestyle if everyone is watching and of course, in my case, nobody is. So the other day I opened up my browser, all aflutter with excitement to see what would await me there. What do I see but an article on “Dating At Forty ~ Fabulous”. EEEEW. First of all I am significantly (more than a decade) past forty. But really. I grant you that forty was probably my peak intellectually ~ now that the hormone thing is causing some memory issues. It certainly was not my peak physically; nor was it my peak spiritually (I seem to be working on that now). I have been married for over twenty years (for the third time, so cumulatively about 30 years) so the opportunity to date at forty did not present itself legitimately. Nevertheless I can say with some certainty that the idea of undressing in front of a stranger again after many years of monogamy, even at forty, was not an appealing one. More to my point, though, is that I don’t ever see “lifestyle” articles for women over fifty, or sixty. What are we? Chopped liver? It definitively seems to me that if I had to date again at over fifty it would not be fabulous at all, it would just be hard! Or maybe it would be ridiculously easy since I am no longer all that easily deceived and I no longer care as much what others opinion of me is. Nevertheless, that whole thing about undressing… oh brother. Apparently there is still some work to do on the “self love” thing (meaning self-esteem, NOT solitary sex, although if I were single at this age, that might just be a solution). Okay, so apparently women over fifty don’t have “lifestyles”, we are just marking time until the grave. I was in the store and looking at magazines and Lucky magazine has cute clothes, etc. It has a section that shows 20, 30, 40 (as in good skirts, or good skin care, for each category). When you realize that you are in a category that is higher than they wish to go, you don’t buy the magazine any more. I am not, however, ready for polyester elastic waist pants and thick shoes. I don’t have a lifestyle but I really do have a life.