So, my son has been gone for a month. Doing what is a story for another day. Suffice it to say he has been away learning how to work and growing some confidence, figuring out how to make his way, a little more, without our help. I am incredibly proud of him, but it is so hard to see him growing away. I want my boy to stay with me, but I want him to find his wings and be happy. It was a good summer I think. Now he has to come home and look for a job here, boring after what he was doing. But first, the point of today’s rant. He flew home from New York, getting in late Sunday night. One of his friends picked him up (that’s a first!) and he stopped home, well after I was asleep (working today), and went off to sleep at a friend’s house. God knows he hasn’t seen them in a whole month! Of course he hasn’t seen us either but we have become anchors, secondary but necessary, rather than his primary focus. This is as it should be, but I think as the mom I have a right to actually see my kid, hear about his trip, etc. etc. etc. But no, here it is about 9 p.m. on monday and I have yet to see his face! Good grief. I’m just the mom after all. But so much of parenting is knowing when and how to let go, when to open your hand and let them fly. I know he still needs us, quite a bit, but he would never say so and we won’t acknowledge it. We will always be there for him, and I think he knows that, we won’t yet acknowledge that either, maybe later. Every time I loosen my hand a piece of my heart takes wing with him.
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